Managing Stress

Stress related illness is on the rise as the demands of life increase and we seemingly have less time for that all important 'me time'. I'm sure most of us can put our hands up and say we have felt stressed at times, and I absolutely include myself in that (I am only human too!). However, despite the increase of life pressures and the rise of stress, there are ways to limit the amount of stress you feel, manage it, and even reduce it.

The 5th of NOvember marks National Stress Awareness Day in the UK and this year (2014) a common theme for the day is 'the balancing act'. This means trying to ensure that a healthy work/life balance is maintained in order to reduce stress and increase happiness. Achieving and maintaining a healthy work/life balance can be difficult at times. With many of us working shifts, long hours, evenings or weekends, it can sometimes feel like there's far too much work and not enough play. Is it really as difficult as it seems to achieve that work/life balance, though?

Over time I have come to believe that if we want to have a healthy work/life balance then we will do it. There are 24 hours in a day and seven days in a week, which means there is (or should be) plenty of time to fit in work, life commitments, and 'me time'. Obviously this is easier said than done, otherwise we would all have that balance just right, so here are my top tips for achieving and maintaining a healthy work/life balance in order to reduce stress:

1. Look at what is causing you stress. It could be work or perhaps it's family life pressures. Whatever it may be, write down the issue(s) that is causing you stress. Having something written down can make it seem more real and enables you to see what is causing you stress.
2. Think about how you might be able to overcome the issue that is causing you stress. If you are doing too much at work, perhaps you could look at doing less. Do you have to do lots of overtime? Do you always have to say yes to extra workloads? The answer is of course no and it is ok to say non. If it's home life pressures that are causing you to feel stressed, think about what you could do to reduce those pressures. Communication is important in just about every aspect of life, so don't be afraid to ask family members or friends for help if you need it. Write down what you intend to do. Once it's written down, you have to follow through with it, right?
3. Put your phone down and turn the computer off. Technology can be incredibly distracting. Texts, emails, Facebook and Twitter notifications all come through to smartphones these days and it can become a constant cycle of checking your phone, seeing what's going on, replying, and so on... It doesn't have to be like that. Personally, when the evening comes I like to put my phone on silent and spend time with my partner or indulge in some 'me time'. Give it a go yourself and enjoy how liberating it feels.

If you're still feeling stressed after giving the tips above a go, or if your work/life balance isn't the issue, then try the following stress busting tips:

• Be prepared for tomorrow. If you've got a busy day tomorrow, make sure you prepare for it the day before. It could be making sure your bag is packed the night before or sorting out your outfit so you haven't got to spend time the next morning looking for something to wear. Knowing you've got everything ready may help to put you at ease and it also means the following day will get off to an easy, stress free start.
• Eat healthily. Of course this benefits your physical health, but what you eat can also affect your mind and indeed your stress levels. Having a balanced diet has the power to reduce your stress levels. The odd piece of chocolate is no bad thing, though.
• Put on some music and dance the stress away. Bursts of activity can do wonders, plus this can be a lot of fun.
• Put on some music, put your feet up, and take half an hour for yourself to calm down. An alternative to putting on music and energetically dancing, which can be just as beneficial.
• Run a hot bubble bath. This is something we all enjoy doing, right?
• Try breathing exercises. Inhale deeply for a count of four, then exhale for a count of four. Repeat this exercise for about two minutes twice each day and you may well find it helps to reduce your stress levels.
• Talk or write about what is causing you stress. Letting it all out can be incredibly beneficial. Keeping a diary or talking to a friend/family member may be just the thing you need to do.

If you try all of those techniques and find none of them work, then visiting a therapist could be the answer. Counselling and hypnotherapy are both powerful tools in their own right that can help people to manage, reduce and even eliminate their stress. Hypnotherapy in particular includes relaxation techniques and can be very valuable for overcoming stress.

The most important thing is that you don't keep it to yourself. Letting stress bottle up inside you could ultimately have very damaging results once that bottle becomes full and explodes. The saying is that a problem shared is a problem halved, and whether that's actually the case or not, there are no doubt some benefits of talking to someone and sharing how you feel.

Daniel Browne

Counsellor, Hypnotherapist, Coach

07816 181428

daniel@daniel-browne.co.uk

www.daniel-browne.co.uk

www.twitter.com/DBTherapy

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How Hypnotherapy Can Help Your Sports Performance

Hypnotherapy is a wonderful tool that has the power to help you make positive life changes. But it's not just useful for losing weight, quitting smoking or overcoming 'issues'..... It's also beneficial in a number of other ways, including helping to improve sports performance.

Hypnosis for sports performance has been practised for many years and professionals who have benefited from it include Tiger Woods, who has used (and continues to use) hypnosis to help him improve his golfing performance.

Why might a sports person have hypnotherapy to improve their performance?

It's often the case that being successful in a particular area of sport requires mental ability as well as physical ability. This may seem a strange thought at first, but it actually makes sense. For example, it used to be a common view that nobody could run a mile in under four minutes. Then along came Roger Bannister, who broke through that barrier and also admits to having had mental training in preparation for his feat. Within a year of Bannister breaking that record many other athletes had ran a mile in under four minutes. It wasn't because athletes had suddenly become fitter and more physically able, but because they had a strengthened mental ability and belief having seen what is possible if one puts their mind to it.

Hypnotherapy is also useful for people overcoming a sports injury and getting back into their game. There can sometime be a mental block which hinders performance, but hypnosis is able to help one overcome that and get back to their best using a number of relaxation and visualisation techniques.

So how can hypnotherapy help improve your sports performance?

Hypnotherapy can help access internal resources that everybody has and help get you into the so-called zone (I'm sure we've all heard that term 'being in the zone'). It can help you to relax, rid yourself of any anxieties, and improve your confidence. In addition, hypnotherapy can help you keep composure and banish distractions and any fears you may have.

Visualisation and mental imagery is a big part of the process and you would be asked to visualise being in a winning scenario. As an example of this I will use my own experience of being a keen rounders player. Since childhood I have always visualised hitting the ball far across the field so that nobody is able to get me out of the game. As a child I never understood how visualisation could help or even what I was doing with my mind; it's just something that I naturally did. But to this day I visualise exactly where I am going to hit the ball and how far it will go. As a result it is extremely difficult for a fielding team to get me out during a game of rounders (not that I mean to blow my own trumpet here).

It goes to show how powerful hypnosis and visualisation can be. If your mind is capable of imagining a scenario then surely you are capable of making that imagined scenario a reality? My challenge to you is to give it a go and see how you get on.

Daniel Browne

Hypnotherapist

07816 181428

daniel@daniel-browne.co.uk

www.daniel-browne.co.uk

www.facebook.com/danielbrownetherapy

www.twitter.com/DBTherapy

Overcome Emotional Eating

Emotional eating; we've all indulged in it at some point, right? Whether it’s reaching for the chocolate when feeling down or treating yourself to something tasty when feeling happy, eating isn't always just about satisfying hunger.

However there is one distinct difference between eating to satisfy hunger and eating to suit emotions. One is a necessity in order to survive and is therefore part of our natural way of living. The other is a bit more sinister and can actually make you feel worse afterwards. For example, if you comfort eat because you are upset, you could end up feeling worse afterwards when the issue still remains and you also feel guilty for having comfort eaten.

It can be an easy trap to fall into and a difficult hole to climb out of once you’re in the grip of it. As with most habits, the first step to overcoming emotional eating is to acknowledge that you have an issue with it. Then focus can turn to changing the negative habit into a more positive one.

Are you an emotional eater? It’s not always obvious and it can be hard to determine whether you are an emotional eater or not. Does having an extra helping of dessert or some chocolate in the evening really mean you are an emotional eater or is it that you simply just like to eat desserts and chocolate? There are a few questions that you can ask yourself to determine whether you are an emotional eater or not. If you answer yes to any of them then perhaps you are an emotional eater.

• Do you eat more when feeling stressed or upset?
• So you eat when you are full as wel as when you are hungry?
• Do you eat to make yourself feel better as a reward?
• Do you eat until absolutely stuffed?
• Does food feel like a friend to you?
• Do you feel out of control around food?

Once you have acknowledged that you have an issues with emotional eating it’s then important to think about what the triggers are; what it is that makes you comfort eat. Some of the common reasons for emotional eating include:

• Boredom
• Stuffing emotions - A way of suppressing emotions, literally trying to stuff them down with food. It's a way of attempting to numb yourself with food to avoid the emotions you do not want to feel.
• Stress - There may actually be a scientific reason for this as when feeling chronically stressed it can lead to higher levels of cortisol, a stress hormone. This can cause cravings for the foods that are not so good for you. That's not to say there is an excuse for comfort eating due to stress. You still possess the ability to say no to the craving and to take control.
• Childhood habits - It can be very common to trace emotional eating habits back to childhood. Maybe you were rewarded with food when you behaved well or given sweets when feeling upset. It's these patterns in early life that can often lead to an emotional eating issue in adulthood as the link between emotions and food intake is made.

When you know what the trigger is for causing your emotional eating you can then begin to break the habit. Keeping a diary is a good place to start. Writing down the times you comfort eat or overeat, what you are eating, and how you are feeling at that exact moment is key to breaking the pattern. Doing this over a week will allow you to see if there is a pattern. It could be that you comfort eat at the same times during a day or even on specific days of the week.

The next step is to change the pattern and choose healthier alternatives to the comfort food. 

This could be replacing the unhealthy food with a healthier alternative, such as eating fruit instead of chocolate. However, it doesn't have to be based around food and it’s perhaps better if it isn't. So here are a few tips to get you changing your emotional eating habit:

• If you are feeling angry or stressed, work it out by going for a run or taking part in any kind of physical activity. Working out can be a great stress buster and it's a much healthier alternative to comfort eating.
• If you're tired or run down, run a bath with lots of bubbles in, lie back and relax. Scented candles will add to the relaxing environment and this will help you to unwind.
• If you are depressed or lonely, call up a friend or family member who you know will lift your mood.
• If you're bored, try taking up a new activity that you may enjoy or invite a friend to do something that will take your mind off the boredom.

The final step to breaking your emotional eating habit is learning to accept your feelings and considering how emotional eating can negatively affect you. If you find yourself reaching for some chocolate, take a minute to thing about how eating it will make your feel afterwards. This will provide the motivation needed to help break the habit.

When it comes to learning to accept your negative feelings, it can be easier said than done, but it’s not impossible. In the same way acknowledging your emotional eating is the first step to overcoming it, acknowledging that you are feeling negative emotions is the first step to handling them in a positive way.

Opening yourself up emotionally can be tough at first, but once over that first hurdle life can become so much richer and you can feel a lot happier, free of the trap of emotional eating.

My Top 5 Tips for Achieving and Maintaining a Healthy Mind

If you’re into self improvement and maintaining a good standard of mental health, here are my top 5 tips for achieving a healthy mind.

1. Keep a balanced schedule. Most of us are guilty of not having a healthy work/life balance at times. Look at ways to improve this.
2. Eat healthily. You may think that this has more to do with the body than the mind, but how the body feels can affect the mind too.
3. Exercise daily. Physical activity can do wonders for the mind. Even it’s just 20 minutes of walking each day, you’ll soon feel good.
4. Get arty. Expressing yourself creatively can be good for the soul. It can help you make sense of your feelings and can be fun too.
5. Develop your social life. Having friends is a valuable part of any lifestyle and it’s fun getting to know other people.

Following those 5 simple tips will help you achieve a healthy state of mind, leaving you feeling happier and more fulfilled.

Depression and How To Overcome It

Depression is a subject that is still quite taboo and sufferers can find that they end up with a stigma attached to them. The reality is that depression is quite common and there’s no shame in admitting you feel so low. I will even hold my own hands up and say that I have suffered from it in the past. If you’re suffering from depression you can make a huge dent in it with simple lifestyle changes such as exercising every day, avoiding the urge to isolate yourself, challenging the negative voices in your head, eating healthy food instead of the junk you crave, and carving out time for rest and relaxation. Feeling better takes time, but you can get there if you make positive choices for yourself each day and draw on the support of others.

Recovering from depression requires action, but taking action when you’re depressed is hard. In fact, just thinking about the things you should do to feel better, like going for a walk or spending time with friends, can be exhausting.

It’s the Catch 22 of depression recovery. The things that help the most are the things that are most difficult to do. But there’s a difference between difficult and impossible.

So, here are my top tips to help you deal with depression...

Cultivate supportive relationships. Getting the support you need plays a big role in lifting the fog of depression and keeping it away. On your own it can be difficult to maintain perspective and sustain the effort required to beat depression. But the very nature of depression makes it difficult to reach out for help. However, isolation and loneliness make depression even worse, so maintaining your close relationships and social activities are important. The thought of reaching out to even close family members and friends can seem overwhelming. You may feel ashamed, too exhausted to talk, or guilty for neglecting the relationship. Remind yourself that this is the depression talking. Your loved ones care about you and want to help. Share what you’re going through with the people you love and trust. Ask for the help and support you need.

Challenge negative thinking. Depression puts a negative spin on everything, including the way you see yourself, the situations you encounter, and your expectations for the future. You can’t break out of this pessimistic mind frame by “just thinking positively”. The trick is to replace negative thoughts with more balanced thoughts. Ask yourself if you’d say what you’re thinking about yourself to someone else. If not, stop being so hard on yourself. Think about less harsh statements that offer more realistic descriptions. Allow yourself to be less than perfect. Many depressed people are perfectionists, holding themselves to impossibly high standards and then beating themselves up when they fail to meet them. Battle this source of self imposed stress by challenging your negative ways of thinking. Keeping a negative thought diary can also be useful. Whenever you experience a negative thought, jot it down and what triggered it in a notebook. Review your diary when you’re in a good mood. Consider if the negativity was truly warranted. Ask yourself if there’s another way to view the situation. For example, let’s say your boyfriend was short with you and you automatically assumed that the relationship was in trouble. Maybe he’s just having a bad day.

Take care of yourself. In order to overcome depression, you have to take care of yourself. This includes following a healthy lifestyle, learning to manage stress, setting limits on what you're able to do, adopting healthy habits, and scheduling fun into your day. Getting 8 hours of sleep per night, indulging in long hot baths, and going for a stroll in the sunshine are all positive things to do.

Getting regular exercise. When you're depressed, exercising may be the last thing you feel like doing. But exercise is a powerful tool for dealing with depression. In fact, studies show that regular exercise can be as effective as antidepressant medication at increasing energy levels and decreasing feelings of fatigue. 30 minutes of exercise per day will do it but you can start small. 10 minute bursts of activity can have a positive effect on your mood.

Eat healthily. What you eat has a direct impact on the way you feel. Aim for a balanced diet of protein, complex carbohydrates, fruits and vegetables. Don't skip meals as going too long without food can make you feel irritable and tired. Substitute junk food for healthy choices. For example, your daily chocolate bar could be replaced with an apple.

Know when to get professional help. If you find your depression getting worse and worse, seek professional help. Needing additional support doesn't mean you're weak. Sometimes the negative thinking in depression can make you feel like you're a lost cause, but depression can be treated and you can feel better. Don't forget about these tips though. Even if you're receiving professional help from a counsellor, these tips can be part of your treatment plan, speeding your recovery and preventing the depression from returning.

The tips above are what I would suggest to a client suffering with depression and I would assist that client in setting those tips as goals and then going on to achieve them.

One of the most important things to remember above everything else is that depression is treatable, you can overcome it, and there is no shame at all in admitting that you are feeling that way. The more people talk openly about depression, the less stigma and taboo there will be attached to it.

Death and How To Cope With It

Here's a little fact for you... One hundred percent of people die!

You may be thinking 'what a way to start a blog' or 'how morbid'. But it is the truth and it is a reality that many people need to face up to. Nobody is on this Earth forever.

Death is still a bit of a taboo subject. People don't like to talk about it and it can be viewed as a failure to live. While birth is celebrated as a new beginning, a success, death is treated with the finality that it somehow does not seem to deserve if we relate it to the natural world. Part of the problem is that birth and death are still unpredictable. They are both certainties though, and human beings, the control freaks of the world, must admit that we have no real control over those processes of life at all. More often than not, we fight it rather than accepting it as fact. But who would really want to live forever?

So what do we mean by the word 'death' and the process by which we attain this state, 'dying'? Generally people are afraid of death. Many people say that they are afraid of the process of dying; whether it will be dignified, painful, long and drawn out, or short and peaceful. Some religious people may not be as scared of death as their non-religious counterparts due to feeling that they will go to heaven or some kind of soul plane once they are gone, but will still admit to even a slight feeling of anxiety or apprehension. The comfort that they take in their religious belief though, is that if they believe they are going to heaven when they pass away, they do not have to entertain the idea of being alone or not being at all. Death itself causes us to face the loss of what we have in the present, and this, along with our lack of control, is where the greatest fear lies. Studies have been done on the kind of fear that people feel when thinking about death. The top 10 have been found to be:

• Leaving behind what we have in this life.
• Total loss of control.
• Leaving unfinished business, either with others or not having done what we wanted to do ourselves.
• Pain, prolonged illness or violence.
• Losing dignity, mental or bodily functions, becoming a burden and worrying that is how we will be remembered.
• Fear of the unknown.
• Fear of how people will manage without you.
• Being judged.
• Disappearing into annihilation.
• Fear of failing.

It is these and other fears around death that lead to people presenting themselves in my therapy room, because they feel a sense of loss and grief stemming from the death of somebody that they feel cannot be overcome.

When a client of mine does attend for therapy because they are grieving over the loss of someone, I spend a lot of time educating them on the issues surrounding grief and loss. I go through everything that I have said in this blog so far, I discuss the fears around death and how maybe if those fears were alleviated, the grief that follows would not be as severe, and then I do a bit of psycho-education (which I do with the majority of my clients). The psycho-education involves me discussing the various theories around grief and loss and applying them to how the client is feeling and their situation in the present. The stages of grief are explained so that the client can ascertain for themselves which stage they are at and then begin working on reaching a resolution and coming out of the grief.

Of course this is a simple way of explaining what can be a lengthy and drawn out process. Everyone is different and deals with grief in varying ways. Some people get over a death in a short period of time, and for other people it can take years. But everybody can overcome the grief they feel, and it's my job to help with that process.

That's all on this subject for now. It's a dark one, but it's also a topic that I believe human beings should be more open about. Let it be taboo no more.

How Hypnotherapy Can Rid You Of Stress and Anxiety

Stress and anxiety are often named as the culprits for people taking days off work and also for people not reaching their potential in life. Fortunately for those people, hypnotherapy is a valuable and powerful tool that can assist with overcoming what can be a debilitating condition. But what are stress and anxiety? This blog will answer those questions and go into detail about what causes stress and anxiety, and how hypnotherapy can help overcome them.

Feelings of stress come from any situation in which we feel frustrated, angry or anxious.

All people need a certain amount of stress in their lives or we would not be motivated to do anything at all. However, chronic stress (which occurs when a person is under constant stress for a long period of time) is responsible for many emotional and physical difficulties. At least 10% of the population have reported suffering from chronic or constant stress, and a survey that took place in 1999 came up with some interesting (but not totally surprising) results. 30,000 people aged 13 - 65 from 30 different countries around the world were studied and the survey discovered that:

• Women who work full time and have children under the age of 13 report the greatest stress worldwide.

• Nearly one in four mothers who work full time and have children under the age of 13 feel stress almost every day.

• Globally, 23% of female executives and professionals and 19% of their male peers say that they feel 'super stressed'.

In fact, research has found that women are more likely to suffer from stress symptoms than men. However, acute stress reactions are often seen in men, especially in the current socio-economic environment. This type of stress is also a factor in cases of depression.

Stress can be categorised in the following ways:

Hypostress: This is when a person is bored or unchallenged and lacking in motivation. People doing repetitive and tedious jobs may find it hard to be motivated in other areas of their lives.

Eustress: This is the one type of stress that is short term and gives people the strength to complete a task. It occurs when people increase their physical activity and creativity. Eustress is a positive stress that increases performance and motivation.

Acute Stress: This is the category that is generally identified as stress. People feel it through tension and physical disturbances, and it can be treated by various methods that generally take six weeks or so.

Episodic Acute Stress: This can be more damaging than standard acute stress and has symptoms associated with hypertension, stroke, heart attack and gastrointestinal disorders. Episodic acute stress is treatable in many cases but can often take up to six months to be brought under control. This often happens with medical intervention.

Chronic Stress: This is a serious state that seems to have no end and is characterised by an increase in the incidence of serious diseases from immunocompetence conditions to cancer and diabetes, and although it is treatable, it can take years to bring it under control.

Traumatic Stress: This is the result of a massive acute stress that is often cumulative. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder comes under this category but that will only be treated by qualified professionals within a multidisciplinary team.

When a client comes to me for hypnotherapy because they are stressed, one of the first things that I do is see how the stress is affecting them both mentally and physically. The most common symptoms of stress are the psychological changes which may present as depression, acute anxiety, confusion and an inability to concentrate, sleep disturbances which is fairly self explanatory but includes insomnia, and sexual dysfunction which can manifest as a lack of libido, inability to achieve orgasm in women, impotence in men, and there is also some evidence that suggests stress can contribute to infertility. There are other ways that stress can manifest, and many other symptoms, but I won't be going into those today. The most common ones are those which are outlined above.

Much of the treatment for stress that incorporates hypnosis will revolve around helping the client to learn to relax and also learn some triggers that will assist them in dealing with the physical symptoms of the condition. The therapeutic process also serves to empower the client to make the changes that they need in their life.

Obviously, every person is different and will have their own issues around dealing with stress, and it is also true that all of my clients must be prepared to take some responsibility for realising that they will need to change their lives in some way in order to remove the negative symptoms from their lives. This in itself can cause anxiety (which I will go on to in a moment). However, hypnotherapy can (and does) help with this. I always ensure that I assist my clients in understanding the importance of taking time to relax and how much clearer their thoughts will become when they do this.

So, anxiety...

Feelings of anxiety come from apprehension or fear, the source of which is not always recognisable. Anxiety can occur when when subjected to long term stress or when feeling threatened by something or someone. People also experience anxiety when they are not aware of what they are feeling anxious about.

We all feel anxious at some point during our lives and this is a normal and instinctual response that serves as protection to aid survival. This works well in situations such as being mugged (we will either run away or fight, depending on what seems like the best option) or when driving and obeying the rules of the road. But sometimes our subconscious mind can work overtime and respond to situations that are remotely similar to one that has made us anxious originally in the same way.

Anxiety can affect a person's whole being, emotions, behaviour and physical health. It primarily creates feelings of fear that will make a person want to avoid situations that it is trying to get us to avoid. Anxiety can then be made worse by persistently thinking negative thoughts that then increases the feeling of anxiety. Anxiety then become cyclical which means that the more anxious a person feels, the more anxious they become and hence the more negative the person feels. The person then creates a greater need to avoid the things that make them feel anxious. This can become everything in a person's life. Therefore it can be a precursor to depression.

Anxiety can be accompanied by a number of physical symptoms as well as the emotional feeling of it:

• Trembling
• Tense muscles
• Churning stomach
• Nausea
• Diarrhoea
• Headache
• Backache
• Heart palpitations
• Numbness/pins and needles
• Sweating or flushing

So, how can I help a client coming to see me to rid themselves of anxiety? After some investigation into what is causing the anxiety I would then use a hypnotic screed (essentially a script that is tailored to the individual) that would involve taking the client to a special place where they feel safe and confident. The hypnosis would then involve suggesting that the client build a shield around them that deflects all feelings of anxiety. The client should then be able to apply that to their real lives. That is, of course, a very brief description of therapy that could take place over a number of weeks.

So there you have it... Stress and anxiety explained, and how as your hypnotherapist I can help you overcome them.